Stop The Pouting if You Want the Reward

Last week we discussed awareness and re-training the brain, when working on drinking less.  This week I want to discuss the importance of allowing urges.  The way we re-wire the brain as we learn to drink less is by allowing urges.  You know what an urge is  - a strong desire or impulse.  It is that voice that says you need to have the glass of wine to relax.

I receive the most questions on how to allow an urge.

The thing is, most people who have tried to cut back in the past did so with willpower.  Willpower is finite though, and typically not a successful route to take on this adventure.  

Dealing with an urge can take a couple forms.  

You can resist.  You might tell yourself "I can't have it", "it's not fair", "I'm not able to drink like everyone else".  It may look like the toddler in the grocery store who wants a candy bar and is relentless to mom, throwing a tantrum and carrying on - super uncomfortable.  And at some point mom gives in because she just can't take it anymore.   

You can react.  You might tell yourself "screw it", "I deserve it", "everyone else does".  This may look like the mom at the grocery store who just gives the kid the candy bar to begin with in order to avoid any of the discomfort.

Or.

You can allow it.  This is the magic place my friend.  You may tell yourself "this is uncomfortable but I can handle it", "I've decided to not drink today because I want to feel great in the morning", "this is something I'm doing for a higher reason".  This may look like the mom who just picks up the kid, shows him some love, but does not give in.  Mom reassures the child it is going to be alright, but he is not getting the candy right now.  Eventually the kid understands the tantrum is not working and gets back to normal.  

When you can begin allowing urges you will see a difference in your desire to over drink.  

This is key to un-learning the over desire.  Doing the work will allow you to feel more in control, peaceful, and productive in your life.  If you like this here's how to dive even deeper - download my FREE Stop Over Drinking Tonight Guide to find out the top 3 tools to help you.