This Is How To Have Your Own Back When Drinking With Friends
Isn’t it fascinating how much energy we use worrying about what other people will think of us if we do, or not do, something? This is especially true when we are working to cut back on drinking. I mean let’s face it - we are a culture that likes to drink. We see it on TV, in the movies, at weddings, and we talk about “mommy juice” - it’s all over. So it is understandable that challenges arise in this area. Imagine if you didn’t care what others thought of your drinking? You just show up, stick to the plan, and be proud of yourself the next day.
Sometimes what happens however, is your friends urge you to have just one more, they tell you you used to be more fun, or they tell you you are missing out on the delicious wine. In that moment I encourage you to take a minute. Really think about all of this. Your friends want you to have another because that is how it has been in the past, or they perhaps don't want to "feel guilty. Trust me, after a couple more cocktails they won’t even remember telling you you should’ve had another 
. Next, were you really more fun? Maybe, or maybe you and the crew just thought you were because you all had a few too many. Imagine if your fun wasn't outsourced to alcohol, and you really had true authentic fun. Next - would you really be missing out? I mean, you can still be hanging with friends, not go off of your plan, and not miss out. (I know - seems crazy - but it is possible! 
). Would you really be missing out on wine, or would you miss out on creating the life you dream of by not sticking to your plan?
I encourage you to pay attention to how the brain is working as you progress towards becoming the person you want to be. Your brain likes to be efficient and continue the status quo. It will easily go to the thoughts to "just have fun", or "one more won't hurt", or "it's just what we do". Becoming aware of those thoughts is the first step. Next, decide on purpose and ahead of time, that you are signing up for some discomfort in the moment, but knowing the payoff will be feeling more in control, peaceful and productive.
Lastly - consider why everyone’s opinion of your drinking is more important to you then your own. 
. Sometimes it is challenging because we are just not yet solid in our own beliefs. What I mean, for example, is - if you had blonde hair and someone told you they didn't think you should have your hair looking so blue, you would think they were crazy. You would know that is not accurate, and you would feel confident not caring what they think. On the other side, as you begin working on drinking less and people start to question you may make it mean something more. It touches a nerve because you have not become solid with yourself. It's just a matter of time my friend. Nothing is going wrong. Continue to believe in yourself, be compassionate and curious along the way, and you totally will get what you want.
If this is something you are working on and want to discuss more in depth, I offer limited free mini sessions. It's a chance for you to get some free coaching, learn more about my one on one program and see if it's a fit for you. No obligation. I love sharing these tools and work with gals who want to make a change, so feel free to hop on a call before the calendar books up!
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