Drink Less, Live More

Welcome back to Mindful Weighs Wednesday!  This week I want to discuss why we eat.  No, really - how often do you actually pay attention to why?  There are two categories of why we eat - sensations and feelings.  We eat for both reasons, and it is ok - no judgement.  But it is fascinating when you start paying attention to the differences, and becoming aware is an important tool in losing weight.  Sensations begin in the body and send a signal to the brain like hot, cold, or tired.  Emotions, or feelings start in the brain and send a signal, or a vibration, to the body like lonely, sad or happy.  The better you are able to tell the difference the easier it will be to stop trying to avoid a negative emotion with food.  Take a moment to think about the sensations you have when you are hungry - maybe your stomach feels empty or makes a noise.  Think about the emotions you have when you feel the need to eat - maybe bored, or celebra...

We are getting a new dishwasher this week and although I’m super excited, I’m also a little nervous about learning how to use the new fangled upgrade.  Lucky for me it will come with a manual.  You all know how important a manual is for any new piece of equipment right?  In case there are any questions on it, I did a little clickety clack to the Googles in order to confirm the definition - a book of instructions, especially for operating a machine or learning a subject; a handbook.  Now I want you to take a moment and really think about where, in addition to machinery, you enjoy holding a manual.   Think about some of your closest relationships and how you think the other person should behave so that you can feel happy or good.  Most of us have manuals for people in our lives, and we think they should just know what the pages consist of.  You may have a manual for your mother, husband, wife, or boss.  The difference between having expec...

Imagine if we all just believed we were worthy as is.  This was a topic of conversation I had with a couple different people this weekend.  Most people laughed and just said yeah.  But really, take the time to think about that.  If you believed you were completely worthy as is, what would you do with your life? Self-confidence doesn’t just magically happen at birth.  It is something you develop over time by keeping your word to yourself and honoring commitments you make to yourself.  For example, you develop a drink plan for the week and you stick to it.  You say you are going to have 2 drinks a night and you follow through with that, and the repetition of follow though builds your self confidence.  You begin to trust yourself.  It is when you just “hope” you will follow through on it, that self doubt creeps in.  Often times we want to avoid any negative emotions so we don’t risk doing anything.  Most of us spend too much t...

Remember that song Hooked on a Feeling?  Back in the day I simply loved the beat of the music, but these days I am high on believing how important feelings really are.  Every single thing we do in our lives is because of how we think it will make us feel.  The same is true for why we don’t do things as well.  In our culture we often think we should always feel good, but that thought actually causes more pain than you realize.  Here’s an idea - what if it is OK to feel uncomfortable, what if its ok to feel any negative emotion?  Guess what - it is part of the human experience, and the sooner you accept it, the less buffering with food and wine you will do, and in the process you will see you can totally handle any emotion. Our brain is designed to seek pleasure, and there is a lot of money made on pleasure - the pleasure of food, pleasure of drinking, pleasure of spending, pleasure of porn, pleasure of purchasing.  The brain is also designed to...

Did you know you can believe anything you want?  No, really - you can!  How fantastic is that?  My teacher, Brooke Castillo, reminds us of this all the time.  Do you recall what a broken record did - it would repeatedly skip back to a moment and keep replaying the same part over and over and over.  Eventually someone would have to get up and make an adjustment on the player, or get rid of the record entirely.  We are able to do that with your beliefs as well.   What we believe and focus our mind on is a choice.  Often times we just think “that’s how I am”, or believe the stance we take is just there, making us us.  What we currently believe is based on our past.  If you want to create a different future you need to create something that hasn’t existed, which would entail changing your current belief system.  This requires consciousness, and deciding on purpose to change what you want to believe.  Here’s the thing - i...

What do you have planned for the weekend?    Who are you meeting up with?    Any idea what time the fun starts?    Who is going to be there?    Are you looking forward to it?   Our brain asks so many questions any given day.    Have you ever stopped to think about the quality of the questions you ask yourself?    Our brains are designed to look out for danger and keep us protected.   The brain therefore is wired to look for the negative.   This was important when we lived in caves and needed to ensure the tiger didn't jump out from behind the bush and attack, however most of us are no longer in caves and typically the neighbors dog is the closest thing to a tiger jumping out of our bushes.  We need to become more deliberate in what we ask ourselves if we want to evolve. It is super important to ensure you ask yourself good questions, in order to find the best answers for you to move to yo...

Welcome back to Thinking about Drinking Thursday, where we discuss tools to help you drink less.  If you are a highly functioning gal who has decided to cut back, or quit drinking - this is for you.  If you have been saying you want to drink less, but haven't been successful I want to help by sharing some tools with you.   We often spend a lot of time arguing with our past.  We believe it should’ve been different - our parents should’ve been different, that boyfriend should’ve treated you better, you should be different.  It causes so many people terrible feelings, and often times these terrible feelings lead us wine in an attempt to forget about it, or feel better.  What if you thought the past should’ve been exactly as it was, because it has made you the unique individual you are?   We often think if only our journey was better we would have a better life.  When you fight against the past you are going to lose - it is what it is....

Welcome back to Mindful Weighs Wednesday!  Have you ever found yourself cleaning the bathroom, going downstairs for a new roll of paper towels, and ended up folding laundry before you finished cleaning the toilet?  You know what I mean - you start something and get easily sidetracked, ending up at a new task, and forgetting what you even started doing!  It’s fascinating how the mind works some days.  I find if I don’t have a plan, and make myself a list, I can get easily sidetracked and off focus.  The same concept applies to food protocols and weight loss. In my program we develop an individual protocol for each person.  Hormones play the most important role in this weight loss program so making a plan, tracking and analyzing is key.  A protocol is a food plan created based on reducing the individuals insulin.  We consider meals, food, frequency of eating, and quantities.  The protocol is developed with to benefit the individual phy...

The Superbowl teams are set and all the fans of New England and Philadelphia are getting ready.   As kids the players on these teams have dreamed about getting to a Super Bowl since they were little.  Each one of them has a compelling reason to get to this level, but even us non Super Bowl playing folks have compelling reasons for what we do in life.  I have clients that are shooting for big goals, and we often talk to about the compelling reason they have for wanting to drink less, or weigh less.  The strongest indicator of success is resilience.  Resilience is the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness.  It’s the effect of a compelling reason to complete something and to evolve.  When we lived in caves in order to evolve we had to move from discomfort and physical suffering in order to survive, which was the compelling reason.  Now a days we live in some pretty fine conditions and in order to evolve we need to move tow...

Remember that song Control, by Janet Jackson?  I’m totally aging myself by such a reference, but I like the line - “It’s all about control and I got lots of it”.  So often I talk to people who struggle with over drinking or over eating and they feel so out of control.  I want you all to know you do have control “to get what you want”. I did a little “clickety clack” to the Googles to find the definition of control.  The first one that came up was “the power to influence or direct people’s behavior or the course of events”.  Now, let’s really break this down.  If you have the mindset the wine or ice cream,  has control or over you, they must be some pretty special bottles and pints to “direct people’s behavior”.  The ice cream and wine just sit there.  I know it truly feels l ike we don't have control, and sometimes it seems like the temptations are “calling” us, but really - they can’t dial the phone, and they have no vocabulary....

How do you think you will feel when you start to see the results of drinking or weighing less?  What if you could feel that way right now - on your way to that number?  My friends, I want to share some fantastic news with you - you should - and you can! The reason we do everything is because of our feelings.  How we feel is always determined by how we think, so we can truly create any feeling we want.  Let’s say I’m working with a client who wants get to a certain number of drinks, or a certain weight.  I always ask her how she will feel once she gets there.  Proud, and accomplished are common emotions that come up.  To start they feel typically feel shame and depression, which will not drive actions to accomplish the goals.  In order to get to the next level you must start having what you think will be the future feelings, now.  You need to feel proud and accomplished in order to drive your actions forward. Here is an example of...

On weekends I like to catch up on Rachael Ray shows from the prior week.  I just finished one that brought tears to my eyes.  Of course, it had to do with a rescue dog - Squish, and a vet from Texas that saved him.  But as many of us dog lovers know, it is often the other way around.  Imagine if every relationship included the unconditional love we have come to know with dogs. If given a choice I think most people would want to choose love towards someone.  Yet, most of the time we end up choosing disappointment, anger or frustration.  We have expectations of people and when they don’t meet them we make it mean something, and feel bad.  I want you to picture a loved one in your mind.  How often do you find yourself saying things like - he should do this, or she should act that way, or how could they do that?  For example, if you expect your significant other to fold the clothes in the dryer and they don’t, how do you feel?  Ar...

Today we are talking money!  I was recently working with a couple of clients on money issues.  One in particular, was telling me how she needed to make a very specific amount in order to cover the sum of all her expenses.  She makes that amount consistently - exactly what she needs.  Interestingly, I recalled a conversation we had about a year ago when she was telling me how much she needed to make weekly in order to cover her bills, and save for an upcoming vacation.  Guess what - thats how much she made. This is such a fascinating idea.  How does she have so much power to make exactly what is required in each instance?  I would offer the idea that she put her brain to work and created her reality.  I suggested she start picking and even bigger number and see what happens to her bank account. Many people are familiar with The Law of Attraction, and The Secret, by Rhonda Byrne.  When I suggest you pick an even bigger number it ...

Welcome back to Thinking about Drinking Thursday, where we discuss tools to help you drink less.  If you are a highly functioning gal who has decided to cut back, or quit drinking - this is for you.  If you have been saying you want to drink less, but haven't been successful I want to help by sharing some tools with you.   Did you ever notice if you want to cut back or quit drinking people automatically think you have a problem, or something strange must be going on?  If you stop to think about it, it’s quite fascinating.  I have cut back, and some of my loved ones are starting to think I’m getting weird.  I had to point out they've always found me to be the odd one - and that's ok.   If you are trying to cut back you may encounter others telling you "oh - so you are being good", or questioning why you are now doing this - or worried things are going to change because you are no longer fun.  I'll let you in on a little secre...

Welcome to Mindful Weighs Wednesday!  How many diets have you tried in your lifetime?  I’m not even sure if I could name them all - The Cabbage Diet, Paleo, Apple Cider, Low-Fat, South Beach, Weight Watchers, Zone, Mediterranean.. and on and on.  How is it we have so many variations of diets to choose from, yet we are facing an obesity epidemic effecting children and adults. I went to the “Googles” for answers.  When I searched the “What is the cause of the obesity epidemic” the answer was fascinating.  On the most basic level it reports an energy imbalance.  Calories in, calories out - isn’t that what all the diets tell us to do?  How has that been going so far?  The second part of the answer I found discussed eating too much, because of lack of willpower.  I also question how successful willpower is - I mean - how awesome does will power feel right?  Who wouldn’t want to watch calories like your bank account, and fight against...

I recently saw an ad for the release of Top Gun 2 scheduled for 2019.  I may be aging myself here, but I loved the original.  Do you recall the scene where they were all singing “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling”?  It brings a smile to my face.  But I recently looked over the lyrics and guess I didn’t realize how much “I need your love” is in there.  Depending on who is saying they need your love, it could be interpreted as a little creepy and weird.  I know, I know - not so creepy perhaps if it is Tom Cruise.  However, in case Tom is not available, I want to offer an amazing idea - anyone, at anytime, can have all the love they want.  In fact, any emotion is available to you at any time. Feelings are caused by what we think.  In order to understand this - imagine you have a lotto ticket in your hand, and as you check the numbers you realize you WON - millions of dollars!  How do you feel?  Excited?  Ecstatic?  I ...

I was recently talking with a girlfriend who is in the process of checking out Match for some dating options.  She had a lot going on in her brain, and it had me thinking what marriage, weighing less, or drinking less, have in common.  Being married to one person decreases the chatter in your brain and gives you a lot of freedom with the constraint.  You have committed to that one person - you don’t have to deal with any Tinder swipes, or Match parings - the marriage has taken place, and for the most part, people just honor that commitment. Now - when I talk to clients about setting a protocol for food or drinks there is initially some confusion over what is meant.  Think of a protocol similar to a marriage in that it is a contract, or plan, you are honoring - a commitment to yourself as you move towards your best life.  We set protocols for eating and drinking in order to decrease the chatter of - should I have it, or - I should not have had that, or -...