Drink Less, Live More

Welcome back to Thinking about Drinking Thursday, where we discuss tools to help you drink less.  If you are a highly functioning gal who has decided to just cut back on your drinking - this is for you.  Today I want to share with you a little about why I want to help professional women feel more in control of their drinking.  A few months ago I was working with a gal who was telling me how she had weight loss surgery, and she was at a loss because nobody told her she would turn to alcohol the way she did after the procedure.  It made perfect sense to me and here’s why. When we don’t want to face an uncomfortable emotion in life we can turn to food to make us feel better.  It totally does the job when we get a dopamine hit from flour or sugar, and as we reward the brain with this false pleasure the brain begins to think it is necessary for survival.  Now think about his, you take away the option to eat as much - how do you feel better?  ...

Mindful Weighs Wednesday This past weekend was my birthday, and come Monday the scale gave me evidence that I enjoyed myself.  Here is the thing though - I did not let that number set me up for a terrible week ahead.  In the program I follow and teach we discuss being in control, decisions ahead of time, exceptions, and math vs. drama.  I was able to use all of these tools around the weekend, and at no time would beating myself up and negative talk accomplished anything.  Today I will share how some of these may be helpful to you in the future. Whenever we develop a food protocol it is done 24 hours in advance.  This allows us to plan decisions ahead of time with the managing part of our brain.  When we are working on decreasing our over desire for flour and sugar it is important to not allow the primitive brain to be in control.  When we are giving into urges we perpetuate the reward pattern, and it will not make us successful in our go...

Hi friends!  I have been a little inconsistent with the blogs of late and I wanted to let you know about some exciting things going on.  I recently completed an Advanced Training and I can’t wait to bring some of the tools to my clients.  I have also been making some exciting changes behind the scenes with the business.  I will be releasing some new free content soon and can’t wait for you to check it out.  Also working on my web site so stay tuned for those updates.  Additionally I am changing up the blog posts to two a week.  I know how important your time is, and I want to make sure you have consistent, streamlined information.  I will post Mindful Weighs Wednesday which will discuss topics around weight loss, and Thinking About Drinking Thursdays which will discuss concepts around drinking less.  Both will also include ideas on how to live more!    One idea I want you to consider as you live more, is that you are ...

This is adapted from a previous post but have been working with so many people recently who can benefit from this concept.  The most important take away is to become the watcher of what is going on - these are thoughts and do not make you you. That glass of wine is calling your name after a long day - between work, kids, the weather - you take first sip, deep sigh out, relax your shoulder, and start to make you feel better about all of it. Interestingly, none of “it” changes. Your brain thinks everything is better because you are reinforcing the learned behavior of over desire and dopamine hit, but imagine if you didn’t have to buffer to feel better. Right now you may have a false idea that the only way to feel better is alcohol, but you will learn if you cut back it’s ok to feel bored, anxious, or unhappy at times - it’s really not the end of the world. Becoming aware of these feelings may open the opportunity for you to take a look at what is really going on - the thou...

Happy St. Patrick's Day!  You don't need to luck of the Irish to make changes in your life friends - all you need is your mind.  If you want to make changes in your life you need to begin believing new things in advance - before even seeing them.   It is especially challenging to change thoughts and beliefs about yourself.    You may currently think “I’m just that kind of person”, “I can’t do that”, “I’m not good at this”.    Pay attention to your feelings when you think these thoughts - they will typically be negative and drive drive your actions to accomplish new goals.   Your belief system is creating your life. The fantastic news is that as a human you have the ability to manage your mind, and create beliefs that serve you. You can choose to keep a crappy belief system, or replace it with a good one which will give you the results you deserve. It will seem odd at first, and you must continuously practice the new thoughts in order to r...

I just finished a book called The One Thing. Some of my take aways included the importance of focus, being ok with some chaos, as well as the importance of saying no. Author Gary Keller discusses how to get extraordinary results with the simple mindset of complete focus on that one thing - the goal you are looking to achieve. When you are looking to accomplish a new goal it is important to begin believing new thoughts. Think about the changes you want to make, and visualize you have already made them - how would you act differently? For example - if you are looking to weigh less imagine you are already at your ideal weight - what would you think about? If you are looking to drink less - visualize yourself walking into the local wine bar - how would you act? In the book he talks about blocking your time to complete tasks important to your one thing, and not allowing any distractions during that time. Life happens, and you will have to be ok with some chaos around you when...

Sometimes I work with clients who have been successful in controlling their weight, but then find themselves drinking more than they want. It’s a fascinating concept, and makes complete sense because desire can be transferable. Desire is a learned behavior. We have a thought - like - I had a long day - which makes us desire something like a cookie or glass of wine in order to feel better.  We reward that desire with a concentrated dopamine hit and after awhile it just seems to be an unconscious occurrence. This cycle eventually makes the brain think we need the hit in order to survive. If you have dialed in your weight but now find yourself reaching for a glass of wine more often than you wish I want you to know nothing has gone wrong.  This is buffering at its finest - escape from what is going on and not wanting to feel pain or discomfort - first with food, now with alcohol.  This happens because the brain is designed to work off the motivational tr...

Here we are middle of March, usually about the time people have faded from their New Years resolutions.  I encourage you to take some time today to reassess what it was you are looking to accomplish.  Keep in mind, what got you here is not going to get you there. If you are in a place where you have hit a plateau you will want to refresh your compelling reason.  Why are you looking to lose weight or drink less?  After you get the first answer to that question ask yourself again and again until your answer is super specific and feels like a reason you will stay on your food protocol or drink plan, no matter what. Remember - the brain is efficient and it wants to keep thinking the thoughts it knows.  In order to make a change you need to change the way you think about food or wine.  You need to work on creating new beliefs and taking massive action in order to get the results you dream of. I’m not saying it is going to be easy friend, but I...

I was listening to my teacher Brooke Castillo recently as she was discussing love.  She said the best way to start bringing more love into the world is to start with your thighs.  I almost fell over laughing, but that is so true.  The timing could’t have been more perfect as I was negative self talking about what the scale told me earlier this morning (now that scale is an entirely other  post  ). It’s so fascinating how our brains so easily tell us all that is wrong within.  We will act so much more lovingly in the world when we can take the time to love ourselves first.  It is almost like when you are on a plane and they tell you to put your mask on before the kids.  You need to love yourself in order to bring more love to others.  Pay attention to your thoughts.  Become curious about what you tell yourself.  Decide if what you hear is a fact, or simply a thought.  Although it may seem factual, most of the time i...

So often we are guilty of playing the blame game. You know - the times when "if only" that other person did something differently you would feel better. For some of you that world would exist if that coworker did her job correctly, or if your partner took out the trash on time. But imagine if none of those external controls were really the source of your feelings. If you are blaming others for how you feel you literally have give someone else responsibility of how you are feeling. Blame is always disempowering to our emotions. Think of it this way - if someone else is responsible for how you feel, you have to depend on them if you want to change the way you feel. That doesn't seem like a winning proposition. There is a difference between assigning responsibility, and blaming. For example, a co- workers lack of effort is why the task wasn't complete - assign responsibility. However, blaming them for how you feel is where there is confusion. You are r...

Don’t forget to “Spring Ahead” later (and check your fire alarms).  Most people will say they lose and hour today, but I want to share some info on how that doesn’t have to be the case.  Most of us take time for granted because we don’t decide in a deliberate way how we want to spend it.  This weekend especially I want to encourage you to fill each moment with what you are wanting to create on purpose, instead of mindlessly “doing your time” .  This is an especially important skill if you are looking to drink less because you gain so much time when you plan drinking on purpose, stick to it, and stop all the negative chatter that takes up so much time. We all know we can waste time with things like worrying, buffering, indecision and regretting.  This weekend of “Spring ahead” I encourage you to stay away from all of that.  These time wasting activities prevent your from evolving, and honestly you will gain so much more time in your life if you ca...

Mama said there would be days like this.  I’m sure you’ve all had these days - seems nothing is going to go right, and it’s not even 8am.  I don’t think of myself as a negative person by any stretch of the imagination, but sometimes we are seeping with subtle negativity and we blame it outside ourselves. Subtle thoughts like I don’t like that, I’m too busy, I don’t have enough time, I’m tired, this is a shit show, or he’s annoying may contribute to it.  In order to feel better we need to focus not on what we don’t want, but instead on what we want.  It is important to remember the brain is always scanning for what it believes.  So if you are thinking your job is making you crazy, your brain will find all the evidence to support that, which will really make you crazy. If there is something we don’t like, or a problem, we typically spend most of our time complaining and talking about the problem.  We complain, judge and express all our opinions...

I was recently discussing self love with a client.  When you are working towards the next best version of you you must love yourself fiercely.  When you encounter challenges if trying to drink less or weigh less you want to know you have your own back, you are committed, and you love yourself more than any other person could.   She asked how to do that - here’s how - First and most important is you choose to love yourself.  Love is a feeling, caused by thoughts so manage your thinking with these in mind - Every judgment is a reflection of what you see, see with love. Loving never causes hurt. Love always feels good. Allow flaws. Love for your own sake. When in question - ask - what would love do, what would love think. Believe in you.   

One of the biggest issues I see with clients having a hard time losing weight is because they rely on their past success in weight loss for belief, which always fails.  The story they tell is they’ve never been able to do it.  Basing your future success, on past fails, will never work. In order to make changes you want you need to define yourself by your future.  The past is over, and you are in complete control of accomplishing your goals moving forward.  Visualize your future self.  Stop looking back.  Consider these questions to help you move in the right direction- What do you want to weigh? What size do you want to wear? How do you want to think and feel about food? How do you want to thinking feel about your body? What do you have to change to become this person? Are you committed to making these changes? When you are able to commit without the past story you will be able to make the changes you want, t...

Oprah and the Abundance Gratitude journal made such an impact on my life many years ago.  I take the time to do my gratified journal daily, and find coming from a mindset of abundance begets abundance.   A simple activity to begin in order to take time to recognize all you have in your life is a simply taking the time to write down five things you feel grateful for.  They can be as simple as the  birds  chirping and spring flowers, or safety of a loved one from a tragic situation. I promise you will be on a positive trajectory to continue growth when you take a moment to start or end your day with this meaningful timeout. Today I am grateful for -  My new office chair  Movie night with my husband  Health of family  Our crazy loving dog  You - those that take the time to read this.  Thank you! 

Self confidence is defined as to be secure in yourself and your abilities.  An easy way to break it down is, can you trust yourself.  We are not born with self confidence - it is something we build up over the years, and the best way to do that is to honor commitments you make to yourself consistently.  Don’t say you will do something like drink less or lose weight, and then sit around hoping it happens.  This will cause self doubt, which is the opposite of self confidence.    Self doubt is often readily available for most of us because we are afraid to try something and feel a negative emotion.  If you have decided to drink less, or weigh less you may be uncomfortable sticking to a drink plan or food protocol.  Truly, do you want a feeling of uncomfortable to derail your efforts?  When you understand you can handle any emotion you will see your confidence build and your life explode.  Your opinion of yourself matters, it is t...

We had a lovely family dinner last night and it is always so fascinating to take a step back and just watch everyone.  People watching can be so interesting.  I encourage you to take it to the next level this week and begin observing yourself.   Awareness is the start of making any changes. Be a compassionate observer to yourself. Understand you will make mistakes, don’t beat yourself up.  Instead take the time to try to understand what is going on.  You can dislike something you’ve done, and still like yourself. See how things play out without berating yourself. Observe, without taking it personally.  Watch from a perspective of curious, fascinated, interested.  This allows you to feel lighter, there is no need fight against it. Accept reality and work with it.  Acknowledge your belief system and you can then decide to change it. Direct yourself to your dreams!

I had a perfectly planned day today.  Photo shoot this afternoon, hair and makeup before, dinner with family after.  And then, a record storm hit the Northeast and due to rescheduling I have more time on my hands, but found myself sitting in confusion over what to do with it.  Don’t get me wrong - I have a lot I can do, my brain just wanted to go to “I don’t know where to start”.  How convenient - if I don’t know, I don’t do -  which on a cold Saturday seems quite acceptable to just hang out.  But time is one of the most valuable assets we have.  I don’t want to waste it.  We literally can not get more of it.  We can manage it, and we can create more within the time we have, but we must be deliberate in using it.  Sitting in confusion will actually cost us time, and if you are looking to up level your life you want to create magical things with the time you have. If you are not sure about your time this weekend I want to ...

I used to love getting mail when I was younger.  In fact, back in the day we actually had pen pals.  For those that may be tad younger a pen pal was someone who we would regularly write to each other, and send through the old fashioned snail mail process.  It was so much more exciting then the bills I receive now.  Today I want to encourage you to become a pen pal - to yourself, from your future self.   This will be a fun exercise for those of you who are currently looking to drink less or lose weight but you just can’t seem to believe you can do it.   First, take the time to dream about the life you want to create.   Next visualize you are in fantasy land and you have accomplished this.    Lastly, write a letter from your future self.  Imagine she is right where you want to be, and have her give you some advice.  What would she tell you to stop doing?  What would she tell you to start doing?  What ...

Welcome back to Thinking about Drinking Thursday, where we discuss tools to help you drink less.  If you are a highly functioning gal who has struggled with your weight, and now finds yourself drinking more than you want - this is for you.  If you have been saying you want to drink less, but haven't been successful I want to help by sharing some tools with you.   It’s a new month and you are working on becoming the best version of you.  Did you know you can believe whatever you want about accomplishing your goals?   You can believe whatever you want is possible.   Imagine your future and visualize the possibility of feeling in total control of drinking your pinot G.   Practice believing this can be true. The only issue is - most of us stay with our old thoughts, and we can’t believe two opposing tins at the same time                     without being very uncomfortable. ...